31

This is the 31st day from when I last used my Twitter and Instagram pages. That's right folks, faythele on Twitter and Instagram are gone for good. I thought I'd finally explain my absence (dramatically) on the last day I'm allowed to re-activate my Twitter account (which I will not), and also present to myself the reasons behind my big move.

In the beginning, I needed a space to put completely random and spastic statements up on. My blog was almost too pristine to dump all my musings that went below a count of 100 words. As people might have already guessed, I treat my blogs with care and concern, and spend up to hours just making this place live up to my own standards. I have total respect for my own blogs because they are the result of years of hard work and dedication.

I like being on Tumblr, Blogger and Formspring because only the people who read it matter/only those who matter read it. The Formspring community is small and comfortable, and being there is really thought-provoking. Questions asked are mentally stimulating, and answers are often witty and comprehensive. I can follow blogs of my interests on Tumblr, and that too is a place where I can be exposed to so many art blogs, writing blogs, band blogs, humour blogs and so much more. I don't think I have to explain the appeal of Blogger. These places are a lot more genuine, since only people who care or enjoy reading them will bother to do so.

I'd tried, many times, to remove myself from both Twitter and Instagram, by deleting my apps, but I fell into the category of addicted when I downloaded the apps again and continued to use them. Since sheer will-power was not good enough, I guess my brain gave me reasons to discontinue. I began to see many things that I did not like on both sites. One night, I got so mad at all that I had seen that I decided I would delete both Twitter and Instagram, and I opened a new, private tumblr to store every little thing I had to say. It now holds the crazy, big or small, as well as photographs to go with them. I started to blog about how much I disliked about the sites. When I all too quickly made a list of about ten solid reasons why they were the bane of my existance, I was utterly convinced to expel them from my life.

Here are the ten reasons that I had hurriedly and angrily typed out:

(Here it comes)




1) The popular opinion. Twitter is basically where the people gather. You get a sense of what people want or like. No matter what somebody says about being unique or a special snowflake, it takes a lot not to be influenced by what people want or like, especially on a platform as intense as Twitter is. I get a sense that I am being bombarded with social expectations to live up to when I am on Twitter. When a certain way is preferred over another, humans tend to lean towards conforming to this ideal unconsciously and in any case. I feel crushed in Twitter, because everybody's opinions are everywhere, and because people are entitled to their own opinion, you want to be that popular opinion, or be in line with it.

2) When I'm a public account, I can't do as I please. When I'm a private account, where do I draw the line? Do I only allow close friends to read my tweets? Do I allow the people from my class to read it? I have followers from other classes, I have followers who are my juniors, I have followers who are of some random organisation. ARE YOU MY FRIEND NOW? Would it be more correct to grant a follow back? What if I start to dislike how my friends behave there? All these social stigmas and dilemmas.

3) The freedom of speech. I hate that people think they are entitled to tweet whatever they like to. The great part about being on twitter is that you are free to do anything. You don't have to answer to anybody. It is when people abuse this advantage to the point of being unstoppable that their judgement is clouded by the idea that there is a freedom of speech. Have you ever experienced the hostility of people who think they own the world? These people don't give a fuck about what you think, or how they present themselves because what matters is if they are happy. At that, I have found the word 'selfish'.

4) Trends. OOTDs



#flower #purple #pink #red #love #pretty #beauty #nature #porn #flowerporn #petals #instadaily #iphone #iphonesia # cute #boyfriend #favourite #own #photo #photography #photographer #filter #rise #vintage #sun #earth #rose #instafocus #aw # sweet #joy #hearts #valentine #asian #girl

Would you like to go much further???

#sepal #corolla #anther #filament #stamen #stigma #style #ovum #ovule #god #Jesus #soil #sunlight #rain #nutrients #cupid #world #universe #life #is #great

5) Look I get that it’s a photography social networking site, but could you please practice some discretion???? I don’t mind if you post pictures of the sky, that’s pretty, fine. I don’t mind group photos and photos of your friends. Easy sharing and compilation of memories. I get that. But what I don’t get is why some people have to post images of their pus filled injury, bloody scabs, cuts, ugly foot, dead roaches, blur photos! If blurring gives some emphasis or is part of an effect, sure. But if that blur does nothing or worsens the photo, I have no idea what the hell you’re doing. Also, nobody wants to know if you are on your period or shitting.

6) Spam. Guilty as charged. Sometimes I have massive celebrity retweets okay. But even I try to keep my fangirl at a minimum! Multiple TT tagging does not help push your topic up the TTs. Once, I entered twitter and thought I had accidentally followed horoscope accounts and allkpop accounts.

7) Ignorance breeds ignorance. And when ignorance turns into pride, I have no doubt it’s time to block the account.  People think they know everything when they have the right to say what they want to say. Badluckcedarian is now blocked because of one thoughtless tweet what was being circulated.

8) Competition. It’s everywhere. We secretly crave reblogs, smiles, likes, notes. The difference between reblogs on Tumblr and retweets on Twitter is that on the former, I actually get to know more about my friends, by that bond over a piece of art or idea. It’s commonplace to want to be retweeted and I accept that. I just don’t accept my own craving for retweets, favourites and likes. I find myself looking to gain these seals of approval from people that I don't even care about, over trivial matters. Whatever for?

9) Security. I’m starting over and I’m starting right. Only I can post and release certain items, and that means security and mystery. Also, my sisters are both on instagram now………..

10) I don't feel Twitter and Instagram are appropriate for me to develop myself like the way Formspring and Blogger can, so I don't want to waste my time on them. Blogger, Tumblr and Formspring accommodate my thoughts and views better. If anybody cares about what I have to say, then they can talk to me face to face, or read my blog/Tumblr/Formspring.

I know that people think it's stupid to get upset over what you see on the internet, but at least I can filter out what I like and what I don't. If I don't like it, I don't see why I shouldn't stop making myself feel negative.

I follow real people, but these are real people who are becoming just like usernames. It is real people and real, unrestrained angst, whining, loud proclamations of private affairs, that make me feel uncomfortable. I can't decide if social media conceals the reality or reveals the reality of us. You can't deny the inevitability of social media. you can't deny the effects of it, you can't deny that it has affected us, but you can't say that these things aren't all bad either. My issue is this: I may not or may not be okay with what people may choose to do, but my biggest regret is how I had tried to morph into something I shouldn't have tried to become, in the face of social media.