Overwhelmed

Do you know how it feels?
It's that time of the year again.
Sitting literally hunched, under all that deadweight.
Emotions, raw, poked and prodded at.
Flesh raw, acid pours down.
That's how it feels I guess, the heavy breathing that you can feel trembling, fading away, as you know you have taken no more than you can take.
Can you feel it?
I bet you can, just that you hide it better.
It's eating me from my insides.

Close your eyes, hide them.
See, even here, you can't let them show.
You're just courting trouble.
It's just so like me, adding on to the weight I feel by throwing in irrelevant stuff, feeling more than I should take.
There's something else I have to do right? Yes.
Except I feel hopeless.
No need to worry, it happens every single year, I tell myself.
I hope.
But it's irony right?

Why is it each time you need something really badly, you can't get it?
Where is it when I need it?
I can do this, I can do this.
Sorry, my psychological self just leaped off the building.

I have a load of things I'm thinking about.
Not all of it is relevant, or even worth mind-space at this point of time.
Glee's on, I'm not even interested.